“One of the secrets of a happy life is continuous small treats. ”(Iris Murdoch)
Pastor Umo Eno, the Governor-Elect of Akwa Ibom State, I guess, must have drawn his ‘Happy Hour’ inspiration from this Iris-British novelist, Dame Jean Iris Murdoch’s philosophical milieu.
Umo Eno had campaigned that he will make Akwa Ibomites happy every Friday by giving them ‘small treats’ at designated bars in the state. He made this known on Arise Television during an interview said he “Every Friday, I will have what I call happy hour for the state. And what do I want to do with happy hour? It is simple. I want to create a business for people that have facilities. So, we declare that between 5pm and 6pm, these are the bars that will sell drinks at a certain price.”
Talks are really cheap! But implementation poses a humongous and daunting task. In Nigeria most programs and projects, particularly by the political class are hatched and executed without painstaking research, proper evaluation of similar programs and their adaptation possibilities. This is largely so because of a long time culture of lack of transparency and accountability.
Our laws and their interpretations and enforcement have been bedeviled by corruption of myriad dimensions. Politicians and their stakeholders, public and civil servants, and indeed, everyone that grabs any opportunity, plunder our collective vault with flagrant audacity, and boldly escape punishment.
Otherwise, what difference would ‘Happy Hour’ of Umo Eno make from Rochas Okorocha’s (former Governor of Imo State) Ministry of Happiness, Ayo Fayose’s (former Governor of Ekiti State) ‘Stomach Infrastructure’ and the Federal Government’s ‘School Feeding program.’ They ended up serving the interests of those that created them rather than the masses for whom the programs were created.
Today, both Rochas Okorocha and Ayo Fayose are battling with humongous billion naira corruption cases with the Financial Crime Commission (EFCC) and billions of naira that was deployed into the federal government school feeding program is still begging for reconciliation.
Happiness is an intangible asset. It is un-quantifiable. It is soothing. It is unconditional. It is emotional. It is pleasurable. In it lies what governance, in its totality, is all about. Any government that does not make its people happy is cruel, callous and wicked. And it transcends beyond creating a ministry or designating bars to make people happy.
It is a whole and entire approach: Security, Youth Employment and Empowerment, Infrastructural Development, Prompt Salary and Pension payments, Ease of doing business, Accountability and Transparency, Functional Health system, Affordable Education, Low Inflation, etc.
Ministry of Happiness, by Rochas Okorocha, for instance, was merely a conduit for financial malfeasance. The state funds were being piped into some children of Adam’s pockets, like ‘Ways and Means’ business that has left a mind-blowing debt on our federal treasury.
Even as the ministry he created, as Governor, was termed by many Imolites, as a failure, he went to the Senate, as Imo West senator, and proposed same for the federal government. He said that the ministry was created to assist Imo people to realize happiness and fulfill their purpose in life. How?
How many indigent Imo widows did the ministry visit with life enhancing materials and facilities? How did the aged fair with regard to health assistance programs and provision of old people’s homes? How did the ministry impact the youths in sensitization and organization of workshops and equipping them with work tools? What about the children? How many holiday retreats and jamborees did the ministry organize for them?
The ministry was rather turned into a joke stick as many Imolites made jokes of it on the social media, like; ’ichiala ochi’ (have you laughed (today)?, ‘if you don’t make me happy I will report you to the ministry of happiness.’ The one that tickled me the most was a video clip where a man was forcefully being dragged to the ministry for refusing to make his wife happy in ‘the other room’, etc. All these caricatures were created because the ministry failed to make the needed impact.
Now, the governor-elect of Akwa Ibom State, Mr. Umo Eno, has campaigned with ‘Happy Hour’ and has won the election. How would he extricate himself from these leprous fingers? One interesting irony to underscore here is that, his colleague former governors introduced that product during their second term in office. And, that made the perceived failure of the program a non-issue to their political ascendancy in the state, but Eno is introducing it in his first tenure, of which, its implementation, whether good or bad will respectively affect his second term bid.
Do not forget that, the youths who hold the ace of any political victory in Nigeria, as it stands today, are at the centre of this drinking largesse. He therefore, has a burden to deal with.
Most of this burden will arise from influence peddling (undue influence of fraternity and relationships), spread and coverage, and administration and control, etc.
The first hurdle he will confront is the submerging number of bars that will be established by his friends, relatives, political stakeholders, church and association members, etc. This group of people will quickly open bars and lobby for selection. The second challenge is, the spread and coverage area of the bars, bearing in mind that he is not the governor for the city centres alone.
He was voted from the ward to local government and to the city centre. Hence, the bar must be located at ward level, local government and city centres, for inclusive ambiance.
Another important aspect of the program is administration; which has to do with the management and control mechanism that is made ope-rant – the rules of the game. The profiling of the bars, in terms of Corporate Affairs registration, quality of products, capacity, size and ambiance, etc. Also, is the bar locations; with regard to safety and security. In the same vein, is the profiling of the weekly participants to ensure that no one person gets repeated ration, and finally, the punishment that will be meted out to the rules breakers.
Hence, the five functions of management, according to Henri Fayol, become inevitable: Planning, Organizing, Command, Coordination, and Control. The planning, organization and coordination should be horizontal and bottom-up. The people, for which the program is packaged, must be carried along.
It is not what governor’s aides and consultants will seat in the coziness of their office and roll out. The program should also be supported by a robust technology for data purposes. There should be upload and download of data and weekly activities for evaluation and control.
Having x-rayed these possibilities and with the benefit of hindsight, I think the task is uphill and would need a critical, decisive and above all, the grace of God, to accomplish without blemish. The 2023 elections did not come like the former.
The entrance of the ‘Obedient Movement’ twisted the entire political ecosystem. It put politicians under intense pressure to over-promise the electorates; and I guess ‘Happy Hour’ is one of those. But, it is not yet ‘Uhuru.’ We wait and see how Pastor Umo Eno, the governor-elect of Akwa Ibom State, will paddle this ship and berth it safely.
Sam Otuonye writes from Enugu
samotuonye22@gmail.com